Why Kindness Week Isn’t Enough (And What to Do About It)

 As a teacher, I’m all for celebrating kindness. Don’t get me wrong—it’s beautiful to see kids write little notes to each other, hold doors open, and smile more intentionally for a week. But if we’re being honest, a “Kindness Week” doesn’t cut it when it comes to teaching kids what kindness really is—or helping them build habits that last longer than the next assembly.


Lately, I’ve been inspired by the work of Andrew Huberman, a neuroscientist who dives into how the brain actually works. And while he hasn’t specifically addressed Kindness Week, his research on habits, emotions, and neuroplasticity (how our brains change and grow) has me rethinking what we’re doing in schools when it comes to kindness.


Spoiler: We can do better.


The Science of Kindness


Huberman’s research would remind us that kindness isn’t just a nice idea—it’s a literal brain workout. Here’s what happens in the brain when we’re kind:

1. Oxytocin gets released (that’s the “bonding hormone”), which builds trust and connection.

2. Dopamine kicks in, giving us that feel-good boost.

3. Stress hormones like cortisol drop, making us feel calmer.


But here’s the catch: for those neural pathways to stick around, kindness needs to be repeated and intentional. A week-long celebration is a great start, but it doesn’t create the kind of repetition the brain needs to make kindness automatic.


The Problem with “Scripted” Kindness


Another thing Huberman would highlight? Authenticity. Real kindness has to come from genuine intention, not obligation. Kids see right through those forced kindness activities where they check off boxes like, “Say something nice to a classmate.” If it feels fake, it doesn’t stick—and it doesn’t activate those feel-good brain chemicals in the same way.


Kindness without authenticity is just… politeness. And while there’s a place for that, shouldn’t we be teaching kids what it means to care deeply, notice others, and act from a place of empathy?


A Better Way to Teach Kindness


Huberman talks a lot about habit-building, and that’s what I think we need to lean into. Instead of a one-week event, what if we taught kindness as a daily practice? Here’s what that could look like:

1. Teach Kids the “Why” of Kindness

Show students how kindness affects their brains. Teach them that when they help a friend, their brains release chemicals that reduce stress and boost happiness—not just for the person they’re helping but for themselves, too. Make it concrete: “When you’re kind, your brain literally rewires itself to make being kind easier next time.”

2. Make Kindness a Habit

Habits are the secret to long-term change. Instead of a kindness checklist during one week, try embedding small, daily acts into your classroom culture:

• Have kids reflect on a kind act they gave or received every day during morning meetings.

• Assign weekly “kindness partners” so students intentionally look out for one another.

• Celebrate moments of kindness as they happen—catch them in the act!

3. Pair Kindness with Emotional Regulation

Let’s be real—being kind isn’t always easy. It takes emotional regulation to stay calm, notice what others need, and act thoughtfully. Teach students how to name their emotions, breathe through frustration, and practice empathy. Kindness and emotional regulation go hand in hand.


A Personal Perspective


This shift isn’t just about science for me—it’s about giving kids something real. As teachers, we’re trying to prepare students for life, not just for their next quiz or class project. If we don’t show them what it means to care, to be authentic, and to act with intention, we’re missing the bigger picture.


Kindness isn’t a one-week celebration. It’s a daily decision. It’s the way we make our classrooms feel like communities. And honestly? It’s the way we change the world.


Let’s turn Kindness Week into Kindness Always. I think Huberman would approve.


Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Why Restorative Practices Aren’t Working (And How We Fix Them)

There’s a trend in schools right now— restorative practices. If you’re not familiar, the idea is that instead of traditional discipline (detention, suspension, etc.), kids have conversations about their behavior, reflect on their actions, and find ways to repair harm. Sounds nice, right? Sure, in theory. But here’s the problem: the real world doesn’t work like that. If you speed , you don’t get a cozy circle discussion with a police officer about how you feel about going 90 mph in a school zone. You get a ticket. If you don’t pay your mortgage , the bank doesn’t invite you to a restorative conversation. You lose your house. So why are we pretending kids don’t need to learn about real consequences? The Brain Learns from Consequences Let’s talk about brain science for a second (because, you know, I’m all about that ). The prefrontal cortex (The Mighty Owl) helps us plan ahead and make good choices. But it doesn’t fully develop until around age 25. So kids? Yeah, not the best decision-...
Read more

AI in the Educational World

  How AI Will Change Teaching, Not Replace Teachers: A 3rd Grade Teacher’s Perspective There’s been a lot of talk lately about artificial intelligence (AI) and whether it could replace jobs—teachers included. But as a 3rd-grade teacher, I’m here to tell you that AI won’t replace us. Instead, it will change the way we teach, in ways that will help us reach our students even more effectively. In the past, teaching often involved helping students memorize facts—multiplication tables, vocabulary lists, and historical dates. While these foundations are important, the reality is that AI can access and retrieve all that information in an instant. So, how does that change what we do? It gives us room to focus more on what really matters: helping our students ask better questions, solve problems, and think critically. Shifting Focus to Critical Thinking AI is already bringing about an exciting shift in teaching, and it’s not about making memory obsolete. You are right- critical thinking and...
Read more

Equity Is More Than Race, Culture, and Religion

By a Teacher Who Sees It Every Day When most people hear the word equity , their minds jump straight to race, culture, and religion. And yes, those are critical aspects. We absolutely must acknowledge historical and ongoing inequities based on race and identity. But if we stop there, we miss the bigger picture. Equity is not a checkbox. It’s a lens—a way of seeing every child, every family, every circumstance, and asking: What do they need to thrive? Let’s get real: equity shows up in the shoes a student wears to school, the food (or lack of food) in their lunchbox, and the chaos (or calm) they return to at home. It’s in whether a child has a quiet place to do homework or is babysitting siblings all evening. It’s whether a student has access to the internet, a functioning Chromebook, or someone at home who can help them with fractions. Equity is giving kids what they need—not what’s equal. Because fair doesn’t always mean “the same.” Fair sometimes means offering extended test time...
Read more